the unconventional wedding

the wedding trip was a success. we made it to see the Spirit Catcher in Barrie (in fact, we took my sister on the way back as well). its creepy, kinda gave me goosebumps, because its so big and, well, pointy looking? i dont know, but it was really neat. 

nux and i walked up to the market to buy some stuff for our tofurky sandwichs, and then stopped at a really nice cafe where i had a pumpkin patch latte (they had soy milk, woohoo!) and nux had a matcha green tea latte. the market wasnt really a big deal, but this year has been a bad crop year for everyone, so it wasnt surprising.  we DID however find some homemade vegan brownies that were made with ground up flax seed. it gave it a sort of walnut taste, instead of being super sweet. i'd post a picture, but we devoured them on the way home :/

we arrived at the resort near Dorset half an hour before the wedding, so we flew up to our room, jumped into our clothes. actually it was more like i squeezed into, and yanked on the zipper of my dress until it pinched all the skin up the side of my ribcage, and tory re-tucked his underwear in his "skinny-boy jeans" 15 times (maybe its time we cut down on beer?). we were left just enough time to shove a bun in our face, find my dad, and run down to the wedding. it was outdoor, and right along the lake, so the scenery was perfect. there was no god crap, it was short, and at the end the bride and groom (without anyones knowledge) ran down to the lake and jumped in a boat that whisked them off across the lake. luckily they came back.

my sister was the maid of honour, and the dude in the middle is my dad, complete with cigarette ashes all over his suit, and a haircut that his girlfriend/friend, the bride's mom gave him, resembling one of the stooges.*sigh*

i think this picture pretty much sums up their seriousness about life. the entire wedding was the most laid back and fun wedding ive ever been to. everyone there was only concerned about having a good time and laughing their asses off, which is pretty much all anyone who is close with the bride and groom does any other day.

after the ceremony, while the wedding party was having pictures taken, nux and i headed back to our room to have a drink on the balcony in our room. as i was talking about how great it is to see people who are less uptight about things having everything go smoothly (kinda like deciding your own "ripple effect", and how you can choose how greatly things going wrong affect everything), we heared a loud tear and crackle in the trees. suddenly one of the trees abit of distance in front of us fell into the woods, and was followed by screams. cursed!

we threw our beers into cups, and ran down throught he path to see if anyone got hurt. no one did. the wedding party was much further ahead, and i never did find out who was standing close to it screaming, but we found the birch laying on top of a hydro line beside my dad's cabin. of course he had no idea, and didnt even hear it from his porch. *sigh*.

when i got back to the cabin, i noticed this on the back of the washroom door, and found it odd. 

we hope you enjoy your stay, good luck with the 2nd degree burns?

the food was awesome, even our vegan meal, but we sat way far in the back  and they didnt have the speakers on, so we didnt hear a damn thing during the speeches. i got up and walked to the little room outside the door where the stairs led to the washroom a couple times so i could hear better. that is, until i (and nux shortly after) caught some scuzzy perv staring at my boobs through the window while sitting beside his wife at a table.  

by the time the dance started my sister was absolutely trashed after downing glass after glass of wine nervously awaiting her turn to say her speech.
this later led to a moment of panic when she had disappeared after making it very obvious that she was almost completely incapable of even sitting up, and some slimy bachelors had mumbled their lack of charm, and distasteful mannerisms to each other while they drunkenly thought i wasnt listening. after asking around to see if anyone had seen her, it became quickly obvious that i wasnt the only one who didnt trust these bastards.

and so nux and i proceeded to bust open the door of every room in the bridesmaids cabins, the washrooms, and all sorts of other places while my heart raced and nux was getting ready to bash someone's face against a wall while trying to make it not-so-dramatic. until finally i found her sitting on the grass by herself beside the lake texting her boyfriend. *sigh*

she proceeded to tell me that those boys were gross, and she would never go near them.  i thought about trying to explain how it wasnt really up to her at this point, but instead shrugged and put her to bed, where she locked her bedroom door.

we lit off fireworks on the beach, though this method of handling, i dont recommend.

and then the bride jumped into the lake, dragged her poor husband in as well, they froze their asses off and lived happily ever after.

except when mike threw the wrong bride over his shoulder. im not sure how a blow up doll got to muskoka, but she didnt look much haggard than the rest of us by the end of the night.

nux, doing what i can only guess is a moose call, the bride, and her mom.

we were still all drunk at breakfast.

-the end.